12.30pm

i hate carlos with a violent burning passion. apparently he likes me so much that he 'requested me specifically' for the mail room. i'm not doing data entry at all. which means i have a cubicle but i'm not allowed to use it, i get paid less, and i have to spend all my time in the mail room with isabel and whoever else gets stuck there. isabel is still the charming lady i remember.... she has an annoying voice, talks even if no one's listening, and pulls back her eyelids so that she can wipe gunk off her eyeballs.

this job gives me pms.

what's-his-name (need to remember; he's nice) suggested monster.com, and i may just do that. i was thinking last night that it might be neat to get work as an editor. or it might suck, but i *know* this job sucks.

i got here and sat down and remembered: ah, yes, this is why i looked forward to fencing so much. a way to release work-inspired homicidal tendencies. oh, and i'm just *so* happy about the 2.5 hour commute. i wish i didn't need the money so desperately.

oh. i forgot about the male version of isabel. fuck me, he's in the cubicle next to mine. i'm going to kill someone.

i'm curious: what does one do with a computer that doesn't have internet access? play solitaire? and how is that better for the company than being online?

need to go to the library when i get back, and set up the sewing table,

[tom, that's his name. gah.]

and check monster.com.

okay, there aren't even any games on this computer. 'here, to make you happier, we'll give you a big box! isn't that nice of us?' ::bangs head on decorative keyboard::

there was something else i wanted to do tonight, but i'm not sure what.

i've decided to eat less. a conscious effort to contradict my 'comfort food' instinct.

(no subject)

so yeah... one of the new guys, he's older and black, and wears lots of gaudy rings, and has a limp wrist. and i was thinking, 'even if he's not gay, he's amusingly effeminate.' and then i noticed that his eyebrows were shaved so that there was just a delicate curve left.... ::snicker:: soooo flaming. he talks effeminately, too. very fun to watch.
i decided i'm not going to worry about not being part of 'the group' at work, which will save me a lot of trouble of trying to get in good with them even if they annoy me. and i spent a while rolling labels. nice brainless work and i can read while i do it. i like that sort of thing. i'd love to be paid for sorting the clips into their various sizes, for example. i wouldn't like to make a living at it, but still.
dad brought up the problem that at least in journalism, you have to be a writer/reporter before you can be an editor. bleh. i'm sure it's that way because editing is easier.

vre now has a youth (under 21) discounted monthly pass. and even with that, i'm going to be spending over $300 on transportation this summer. i hate commuting, did i mention that?

i'm feeling less bitter now, but i don't know how long that will last. i think the pill is messing with me, either that or i was really worked up about this job. when i discovered that i'd be spending all summer in the mail room, i cried in the bathroom. post menstrual syndrome? pseudo pregnancy mood swings? i don't get it. i had morning sickness a few weeks ago.

forgot to eat lunch... actually, i didn't. it just really wasn't appetizing. so i had a raspberry mocha chip frappucino while i was waiting for the train home.

for someone who works for a company that until recently was called 'computer based systems inc', carlos is computer illiterate. ('it's just a name, not anything we actually do,' says my dad.) running windows 95, he gave me my login and told me to put 'password' as my password. i retyped it when it prompted me to, and then carlos came back asking if it'd asked me to change my password as someone else had gotten confused. and then there was more confusion and carlos said, that means anyone can get onto your computer (well, it's windows 95, they could anyway. i got on without logging on earlier.) so i said, okay, and went to change my password. start > settings > passwords, and carlos says, very worried, "what are you doing?!" umm... changing the password? he really had no idea. guys like him make me think i could do tech support for a living. which is just sad.

i was hoping the train would be late today, because if it's late 3 more times and dad gives me his free ride tickets, i will only have to buy 3 more 10 trips, instead of 4. this is a good thing.

went to the library and came home with 'martial arts of renaissance europe', 'queen elizabeth's wardrobe unlocked', and 'she'. with a cd in the back! spiff. very much spiff.

and stuff. forgot to take the trash out last night so i have to do it tonight. pretty much all i've eaten today is comfort food. but at least i haven't eaten much of it. i need new music... trance/electronica stuff, which i've been listening to a lot of but don't own any of.

eventually i'll write my birthday present todo list. or maybe i'll do it when i'm bored at work.

(no subject)

oh, right. things to do: call marcellus at work and get his cell phone number, and request a ride to fencing practice. get to old town alexandria somehow and get new cargos.
and less urgent: order an epee. decide on a soft or hard fencing case, and buy one. buy a mask. sew like a madwoman.